Freedom from Self Doubt

Doubt.  Why is it that we are so prone to doubt ourselves?  We doubt what we are capable of, we doubt our gifts and natural talents but quickly admire these very things in others.  We spend hours keeping up with what others are doing and how they are using their talents, even growing envious of how others show up in this world but yet we are consumed with doubt of our own.  Why is that?  Why do why believe that only certain people get blessed with these things? Why don’t we believe that we have what it takes to show up and have something to offer this world as well?  

Self-doubt is defined as the tendency to doubt your own competence, worth, and personal value.  From this definition alone, it is clear that self-doubt is harmful.  Self-doubt creates a negative view of self which can have a ripple effect on every aspect of one's life.  

The Bible says as a man thinketh so is he, and it also states that as a child of God you are chosen, a royal priesthood, that he has given each of us gifts and abilities. He says that your gifts will make room for you. 

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. 1 Peter 2:9 NIV

We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. Romans 12:6 NIV

A man’s gift makes room for him and brings him before great men. Proverbs 18:16 AMPC

The act of self-doubt is contrary to these verses.  Self-doubt says you aren't competent, but God’s word says you were chosen.  Self-doubt says, you are not worthy, and God says you are a royal priesthood.  Self-doubt says you have no value and God says, your gifts will make room for you.  Who do you choose to believe?  God or the lies of the enemy aka self-doubt?  

For many years I was unaware of the confidence that can come into your life just by taking God at his word and choosing to believe his word over every other voice.  While I can make the choice to believe what God says most days; there are some days where it’s just plain hard and I really struggle with this, so I know that it is easier said than done.  

Doubt creeps in because we are living a human experience.  Believing God is a choice that we have to continue to make as our faith muscle is built.  We all know that the more you exercise a muscle, it grows and strengthens.  Our faith grows in that same way. 

How can we begin to believe God’s word and grow and strengthen our Faith:

1. Pray and ask God to increase your faith.

2. Set aside time to listen to the voice of God (more on this in a post to come)

3. Read and memorize scripture, and speak it over yourself when the lies start to fill your mind. (Reject the voice of the enemy )

4. Exercise your faith. Step out and do the things that God gave you the faith to believe you could do. Watch him show up for you!

Prayer:

Heavenly Father, I thank you for giving me the words to share your truth.  I pray that everyone who needed this message and desires to grow more in their faith in you will be encouraged.  Knowing that you are a GOOD God who created them and uniquely designed them, for your purposes on this earth.  Let them know that they are precious, loved, and pleasing in your sight.  Fill them with your love and light so that they may go out and spread it to a dark world that needs them and the gifts that they have to offer.  In Jesus name we pray.  Amen <3

Freedom from Guilt and Shame

Guilt.  What is the first thing that you think of when you see the word Guilt?

This may sound extreme, but I think of a criminal, someone who is found guilty.  Someone who has done something deserving of punishment, if not for good, for a very long time in order for the lesson to be learned, from which they may be redeemed.  It’s interesting to break down the thought this way because it helps us to examine our belief behind a word.  Though we are talking about guilt as a feeling or emotion, it still relates to how we punish ourselves when we feel guilty or when guilt is inflicted upon us.  

Shame. How does it relate to guilt?

Guilt says “I’ve done something wrong” and Shame says “I am wrong”.  Shame is defined as; a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior.  When we hold onto shame, we allow the belief that “I am wrong” to become our identity.  With shame, there is no separation of the actions and the person. There is condemnation, which comes from the enemy.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. -John 10:10

 Shame keeps us from showing up and living a purposeful life by keeping us in hiding.  This is exactly what the enemy wants.  To silence those who may have otherwise been used by God, had they learned to let go of shame and walk in freedom.  Whether your feelings of guilt or shame are self-inflicted or imposed on you by others, this lasting feeling is not of God nor is it what he wants his children to experience without end.  No matter how much that friend or family member may try to guilt trip you into doing something that you know is not God’s will for your life, or how guilty you may feel over a mistake you have made.  Even if you have said something to put your foot in your mouth, or relapsed into an addiction once again, God’s grace and forgiveness are sufficient for your healing from guilt and shame.

What happens when we bring our guilt and shame to God?

Guilt for behavior or for sin that we actually did commit, when we bring it to God, can humble us and lead us to repentance.  Repentance is the path to forgiveness of our sins.  Sin is defined as ‘missing the mark’ of God’s will.   I hope that you find comfort in knowing that we all ‘Miss the mark’ from time to time.  If we were perfect, we wouldn’t need our Perfect Savior Jesus Christ.  He already knew that we would make mistakes, but he still loves us the same. What matters to him is that we come to him with a repentant heart that can be transformed.

Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord. - Acts 3:19

Guilt imposed on us by others can also be brought to God, either convicting us of our wrongs or allowing the peace that comes from the truth in his word to be a shield for us against wrongful condemnation.

Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him. - Proverbs 30:5

How we move forward.

I want to leave you with these 3 points by Pastor Irene Rollins, author of  “Reframe your Shame: Experience Freedom from What holds you back”

3 Things to reframe your shame:

1. Focus on Jesus  - Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. Colossians 3:2 

2. Focus on Forgiveness - If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

3. Focus on Freedom - Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 2 Corinthians 3:17 

Until next time! 

Much love,

Fatima

#LiveFree

#TheFreedomSeries

New Year, New Me? (2 Years Later)

Hi Everyone! It’s been 2 years!!! That’s right 2 years!!!  I know some of you may be wondering…“what in the world happened to you?!”  Well, a lot of what's happened to most of us…

Life in the midst of the unknown, life in the midst of major change, life in a Pandemic. 

As we are all finally seeing the light out of this tunnel of the pandemic, the light in me is dying to finally peek out again and reconnect with the relationships with once I felt deep connections, the passion that I have for pouring myself into my writing among a few other creative outlets, and to just move more freely in general.  It’s 2022! A year that still sounds so strange to this 80’s baby, but here we are! 4 months in to be exact.  Which is OK because April symbolically is the month of “New beginnings” and has been that way for me for some time, as it is the month of Christ’s resurrection after which comes new life!  But before we move forward into this second quarter of the year, I just want to take a brief look back first.

2020 was a year for the books.  Many of us went into the year with such optimism, hope, and excitement for a year that we thought was going to be our best.  Then as an entire World, we got hit with so much.  From a national panic due to a pandemic, the loss of so many loved ones, many dealing with the loss of their businesses and jobs, to highlighted racial divide and injustice, and more.  

This was NOT what I had in mind on my last post when I said “2020 Vision/ Clarity”.  Though in hindsight it really did open our eyes to a world we never imagined.  It’s almost laughable how much we think we know and yet life seems to humble us and remind us once again that we are not in control.  

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” -Isaiah 55: 8-9

I know we all had our fair share of moments of this truth this year but it’s on my heart to share with you a deep dive into mine, with hopes that it brings you peace, relatable circumstance, or maybe even shared lessons that I’ve learned.

At the end of 2019, I had just gotten engaged and had this glimmering outlook on life.  It’s possible I was just blinded by the sparkle of my ring lol jk guys!  But seriously I was on a cloud of joy and excitement.  I was “Ready” for everything that the year had to bring me, then BAM  like a ton of bricks that vision came crumbling down.  On March 3rd, 2020  a random Thursday, my fiance at the time was over hanging out and having dinner with me when I got a cryptic phone call from my Mom that instantly made my stomach drop.  My childhood Pastor, family friend, and the man that had baptized me into the Christian Faith had taken his own life.  Though I had experienced my own personal low many years ago which allowed me to understand the thoughts of suicide, still the amount of shock, confusion, and pain I felt from this was inexplainable.  I struggled to process and pick up the pieces.  It more than a little bit rocked my world, even more than I had actually realized at the time.  

Next came the COVID1-9 pandemic.  One day we’re all at work and things are “Normal” and the next we’re forced out the door and being told that we “Must exit the premises and work from home for the next 2 weeks”.  If I'm being totally honest, to work from home full-time was my dream.  To me, home is my favorite place to be, so I was happy to get a break from office life.  But as the virus continued to spread, suddenly 2 weeks turned into 2 months...2 months into 6 months..6 months into 8...then Bam here we were still in the same position 1 year later.  Talk about hindsight being 2020.  With the dangers of the virus, we were forced to change how we interacted with friends/family, where we worshiped, where we dined, how we celebrated Birthdays and special occasions, and more.  

With no clear vision out of this pandemic and a desire to honor God with our relationship, Michael and I decided to get married in a small ceremony (just us 2), move together, then shortly after we purchased a home in the burbs.  It was like our dreams were happening in fast forward but with protective masks, and fewer people present.  Nonetheless, these were some of the best things that happened for us in 2020.  This was our sunshine in the rain.  Or as one of my friends would call it,  “COVID lemonade”, where we made lemonade out of the lemons we were given.  

In 2021 things were looking better with a vaccine for the virus and booster shots.  Still, unfortunately, we were met with more scares and even the loss of more loved ones due to covid and other illnesses.  Thankfully still with as much loss as we experienced, we also were able to have more celebrations.  Michael and I Finally had our Wedding, though still on a smaller scale, it was more beautiful than we imagined.  Literally and figuratively as it also connected and brought healing to our families.  It reminded us that our union is greater than us.  That God brought us together to mend some of the wounds of our loved ones but also to break curses for the future generations of our family.  We also celebrated some of our closest friend's weddings and also welcomed new life!  Something else that I took advantage of for the first time was dun dun dun……..Therapy.  It’s something I’ll share more about in another post but is something to not leave out as it was a game-changer for me.  I learned that it’s absolutely ok to need a little help processing things and healing past trauma.  

The past two years may have knocked us all off of our game at some point or another but I’m here to tell you today that no matter how these past couple of years may have rocked you, made you fall off the wagon, or made you lose sight of the vision that you had for your life; you can choose to get up and get back to purpose, your goals, hopes, and dreams or allow God to help lead you to new ones.  Every day is a day to start fresh.  Yes, MANY things have changed but for those who believe, the changes both good and bad are ultimately FOR OUR GOOD.  Happy Second quarter of the new year yall.  Let's keep going and moving forward!

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” -Romans 8:28

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” - Jeremiah 29:11

P.S.: How we’re dancing into the future!